#LowesBlows

In the past few years we have bought the following items at Lowes:

• A Washing Machine
• Carpeting
• A Dishwasher
• A Storm Door

And every single installation had a problem. Every single one. And believe me it’s not us…we’re not those type of people who are high maintenance or hard to please. At least I’m not.

It started with the storm door. I take the day off of work, the dude shows up to install the door, and realizes he doesn’t have the door on the truck. And guess what? There’s no time to go back to Lowe’s and get the door because that would make him late for every other installation he’s got…you know, those lucky folks whose doors are on the truck?

Next it was the carpeting. We shell out what for us is serious coin for new carpeting for 85% of our ground floor. After moving ALL the furniture out, the dudes show up to install it, take out our old carpet and begin rolling out the new. The head installer starts scratching his head and calls Lowes. Seems they cut the carpet wrong. I don’t understand all there is to know about carpeting, but Lowes messed up our measurements somehow. They were able to install it, but there are areas where I can see the cut lines…they don’t join seemlessly…something about the nap due to the cutting error.

We called, complained, and got $300 off our bill. Oh, and that carpet? After only a few years it’s buckling. Our carpet looks like a tidal wave right in front of our wall unit. We called to ask if this was normal after just a few years and got some song and dance from the manager. Thanks, fella.

With two strikes against them, we next purchased a washing machine from Lowes. When the dudes installed it, they busted our turn on valve. They claimed it was old and rusty, and we needed to call a plumber to get it fixed before he could install the washer.

I went ballistic.

I said something to the effect of you are the professional and should’ve realized before you forced it that the valve had the potential to break. I got on the phone with the store manager and insisted that THEY pay for the plumber to come and fix the valve that his installer broke. They did.

And we got a gift card for this being the third time we’d had problems.

When our dishwasher broke just a few weeks ago, I pleaded with hubby that we go anywhere else to buy it. Problem is, the Lowes by us is the only game in town. All the other joints that sell appliances were either too expensive or too far away for reasonable deliver. So we were back at Lowes with high hopes and crossed fingers.

After all, they couldn’t possibly fuck up a 4th time, right?

Installation of the new d-wash was successful! I’d run it a few times, was pleased with how quiet it was, and doubly pleased that the utensil basket did NOT go on the door. I hated that about our old washer – all sorts of crap would get stuck behind it on the door, and it was gross.

So I go to do dishes this past Saturday, open the d-wash door and see that 1/3 of the seal gasket had totally become detached…it was just hanging there like a black snake. After two weeks.

LowesBlows strikes again.

Hubby gets on the blower and ruins some poor appliances manager’s Saturday evening. We were promised Monday delivery of an upgraded dishwasher at no extra cost. Monday comes and hubby calls the installer to find out when he’s showing up.

Good thing he did.

The installer says, “The washing machine is there already right?”

Hubby says, “no, it’s at Lowes.”

Installer says, “Lowes told me it was at your house already.”

WTF…..can you imagine if my husband didn’t call the installer? He would have showed up and it would’ve been the storm door all over again…”gee willikers sir, it’s not on my truck!”

Hubby calls Lowes again. I am now the proud owner of an upgraded Whirlpool dishwasher and a $100 Lowes gift card. But you know what blows as much as Lowes?

The utensil basket is on the door. Typical.

POSTSCRIPT:
We spent our $100 gift card on a new grill. We get it home, and over the Memorial Day weekend, buy a ton of meat, and go to start that bad boy up.

Nothing. We managed to get the pre-built grill with a busted starter. After a phone call to the store manager, we got a new one delivered ON Memorial Day. But not the same grill. Oh no. This sucker has 4 gas jets and a side burner. I’ll be grilling and chilling all summer long.

A Comcast Customer Lives in a Special Kind of Hell

As of today I officially hate Comcast. Like really super duper seethingly passionate hatred.

Let’s be honest. I’ve always hated the cable company. It all started with Cable Vision when I lived in New Jersey. They were notorious for failing to show for scheduled appointments, and then telling you that they dame, but you weren’t at home. This is after you’d spent the last 5 hours waiting in your home that was sans cable.

Before Comcast came to my humble little home, I was dealing with a cable company that was so utterly inept, so entirely clueless, that a call to solve your issue literally took hours. So when Comcast took over, and my internet always worked, and my cable only went out when a monsoon was blowing through, I was thrilled.

But over the past year or so, the service has really begun to suffer. I’ll sit down to watch something on Demand, a service they love to advertise in order to get you to “choose Comcast,” and I’ll get an error message.

Grrr.

Now I have to call Comcast, where the automated bitch will tell me she’s sending a bullet to our TVs which should solve the problem. When that doesn’t fix it, you have to call again, and the customer service rep, who 95% of the time can barely speak English, tells you to unplug your box for 30 seconds and then plug it back in.

After the tv takes 20 minutes to reboot, the problem is usually fixed. But, I’ve now wasted 30 minutes of my time when all I wanted to do was plop down on the couch and watch last night’s episode of “The Bachelor.” (aside…wasn’t Juan Pablo a tool?)

If it were just that problem once in a blue moon I wouldn’t be complaining. Everything goes on the fritz every now and then. The problem I have with Comcast is that the problem happens over and over and over again on every cable box I own. Not just one, not just two, but ALL THREE.

Once one box is fixed, another goes klabooey 10 days later. Once that one is fixed, a week later the third decides it doesn’t feel like working. And around 9 days after that, the first cable box will once again lovingly display it’s error message.

I’ve got Comcast on speed dial. Bonnie & Clyde were hit with less bullets than have been sent to my house courtesy of my shitty cable company.

But Monday afternoon I got fed up. Monday & Tuesdays are my early days – I get out at 2 pm – and I was looking forward to a walk, and then sitting down to watch the two episodes of “Walking Dead” that I had missed. I finished my walk, shucked my shoes and socks, and  with my feet up on the table hit the On Demand button.

I was rewarded with yet another error message. I muttered a not so silent expletive, got up and unplugged the box dialing 1-800-COMCAST with my free hand. I had 20 minutes to kill – may as well chew someone’s head off while I waited for my TV to reboot. I didn’t even want a technician…I just wanted to yell at someone.

Once the TV came back on, not only did On Demand not work, but my DVR was gone as well. Mother f-er – my patience was certainly being tested today! Another call to Comcast landed me an English speaking American based service rep – things were looking up. She was super nice – scheduled an appointment for a technician to come the next day, listened to all my griping, and commiserated with my misery. I felt somewhat placated, but was still angry.

The next day, home early again, I skipped my walk because I didn’t want to miss the cable guy who was coming between 3 and 5. 3 o’clock turned to 4. 4 o’clock turned to 4:45. I picked up the phone and called Comcast. Because we had a scheduled appointment, I got a recorded voice saying, “Your appointment is scheduled for 3 pm to 5 pm. Your technician should arrive between 5:05 and 5:35.”

That in itself was a riot. I’m so glad you are admitting to me that my technician is sorta late. As long as he’s still coming.

And at 5:30 we got the call. A Comcast rep called to tell us that our technician called in sick and nobody would be coming today.

Can you say ballistic?

I went off on this gal. If the dude called in sick, why couldn’t they call us to let us know RATHER THAN HAVE ME SIT AROUND MY HOUSE FOR 3 HOURS ON A BEAUTIFUL 75 DEGREE AFTERNOON?

When she tried to reschedule for the next day, I told (screamed to) her that I have to work to make the money to pay for their shitty service. After a few minutes hubby grabbed the phone from me. I was irate and getting nowhere towards getting our cable fixed.

Hubby could be home for the technician if they came between 8 and noon. Fine. He had already nabbed us a $20 discount for the no-show technician. I guess I could live without the DVR and the On Demand for one night.

The next day the dude shows up begins to trouble shoot our lines. I had to leave for work, and left him in hubby’s hands. I came home to a “new” box in my living room, which was not actually new. A scratched, ugly, disgusting refurbished box sat where my well taken care of old one used to be. Seems Comcast doesn’t make new boxes anymore for crappy poor folk like us who can’t afford their snazzy and expensive triple play super high def cable package. Only those rich folks get them nice new shiny boxes.

Oh, and we lost every single thing we’ve ever taped.

I hate Comcast. Can I say that again, please? I seriously need to look into alternatives to traditional cable. However, after a bit of research, that is going to mean a technological leap of faith that I don’t think my family could handle.

Yet.

But I’m going to make it my goal to change their minds. I am so tired of these dickheads taking my very hard earned money and giving me sub-standard service in return. The day will come. The day will come when I can give Comcast a huge middle finger farewell salute, and tell them they don’t have Typical Tracy to push around anymore.

Postscript
I’ve just had to make two more phone calls to Comcast tonight. Our new box came, and our OnDemand still doesn’t work. Cris, my first tech who was very hard to understand, gave me the “I put in new codes don’t use your on demand for 30 minutes” speech. An hour later, it still doesn’t work.

Second call to Sean placed and he is resetting the box to factory settings – now I am 45 minutes without my tv at all. Comcast if you’re reading this, feel deep shame as you type me some bullshit tweet or message about wanting to help. You don’t know the meaning of the word.

Postscript to my Postscript
It is March 20th. My Comcast nightmare began on March 10th. I have been on the phone with them every day – sometimes more than once – for 10 days. They have missed 2 appointments, and wasted roughly 8 hours of my time, not to mention at least 3 hours of viewing time I’ve lost while I was stuck rebooting boxes.

I think it’s finally done though. I think I may not have to call them again. I don’t know if I can keep my sanity if I get another error message.