Everyone has their favorite songs. I can listen to “Let’s Go” by The Cars over and over again and never get tired of it. I’ve heard “Born to Run” so many times that I’ve gone beyond just singing the words – I now have memorized every note played in the background as well. But there are songs all of us hate – songs that make us lunge for the dial the second the first note is played.

The following are the songs that immediately came to my head when I thought of tunes that make me physically ill to have to listen to. If I have my way, I will leave the premises or change the channel when any of the following are on the airwaves:

Jack & Diane. First of all, let me state that I have declared my brain, body and soul a John Cougar Mellencamp free zone. I have come to the conclusion over the years that he sucks. But this song? It’s the one I hate the most of all. Perhaps because I can never drive from point A to point B without some lame radio station playing it. Little ditty, my ass – Life may go on, but this song goes on and on.

American Pie. This is the most monotonous song on the planet. It’s like the song that never ends, it just goes on and on my friends. Somebody started singing it not knowing what it was, and now they go on singing it forever just because this is the song that never ends….

You get my drift. When I hear “A long, long time ago” I think “this song started and is still playing somewhere.”

Freebird. I know this is a rock classic, but overkill has put it on my “dear God, not again” list.

When I was a kid there was this awesome sub shop called “Joe’s Subs” in our town. A half a sub and a soda came to around $2.00 which was an expensive lunch in the early 70’s. They had a jukebox in the back, and I don’t think there was ever a time where I was feasting on my half-a #1 when that song didn’t play. I wasn’t a big rock fan to begin with at that age – I was more into the Captain and Tenille than Skynyrd, so that might have played a major role in my aversion to this song. BTW, I can do without “Stairway to Heaven” also

Mr. Jones. This song by Counting Crows just fucking annoys me. Maybe it’s because I feel like it’s a male rip off of Me and Mrs. Jones, the 70’s classic by Billy Paul. Or maybe it’s just because the song is just plain shitty. All I know is the first few “la la la la la la’s” have me reaching frantically for the dial.

Hey Soul Sister. Ok, a co-worker had this as her ring tone and was never at her desk, so I was subjected to the never ending repeat of the ukulele and “hey, hey, hey-hey-hey-hey, hey-hey-hey-hey” over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again.

She Drives Me Crazy. Back in the mid-nineties we moved to Florida and had to live with my husband’s in-laws for about 5 weeks until we found an apartment. It was beyond great of them to take us in, and I was grateful for their hospitality. But my sister-in-law would play “She Drives Me Crazy” a few times a day every day for the entire time we lived there. It took my dense little brain a few months (yes months – way after we moved out) to figure out that she was playing that as a ball buster. I think she hated that we were there, and this was her little dig to help get her through our invading her home. I can’t listen to this song without thinking that someone sorta hated me for a little while.

Anything Country. Anything. I hate country music on so many levels, that I can’t even be in a store where the music is playing. I can’t concentrate on my shopping…all I hear is the whining, twangy voice complaining about how crappy life is, or how he’s been done wrong, or how he loves his truck.

Maybe I should do a follow up post about bands I just don’t get. They go beyond a single song – they are bands who cannot produce a single song that speaks to me – bands like U2,  Dave Matthews, and Pearl Jam.

What songs do you hate?

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