Since Christmas I have had to return or completely throw out 3 toys due to breakage or malfunction. Is it me or does that track record suck?

Toy #1 to break was a Dancing With the Stars Barbie. Her arm practically came off after 15 minutes. I’d try to make some clever DWTS joke here, but I never watch it. While the show is lame, Barbie’s dress was really pretty. But even so, Nancy Grace managed to last longer than my Barbie. Ok, I guess I did have one joke in me.

Toy #2 was an ice cream maker by Discovery Kids. Thank goodness I bought this for $13 bucks on clearance, because after trying to make strawberry ice cream and coming up with nothing more than very cold pink slush, I was not in the mood to wash and attempt to repackage this piece of garbage. It went straight into the dumpster along with a scathing review on Amazon – along with the 17 other bad reviews. Note to self: Next Christmas, read reviews before you buy.

Toy #3 was the Cars Lightning McQueen remote control car. This thing looked cool – it had a video screen for the eyes and the mouth and it talked and blinked and was really neat looking. My youngest wanted it bad for Christmas, but it was $50 bucks, and with all the other expensive stuff she got (sans crappy ice cram maker) I figured if she wanted it she could buy it with her own money. Which she did today.

And it was defective. The damn thing would completely shut down after it ran into the couch more than 2 times. I read the instructions and did some online research and determined this was not normal operating procedure for this toy. Luckily I had the forethought to open the package very, very carefully. That puppy is going back tomorrow.

From now on, I may stick to video games. They are fairly reliable, and you seem to get a hell of a lot more play time out of them. I may never get the tv again, but at least I won’t spend a month of Sundays in the return aisle.

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