Love my Housewives, but I'm partial to the tri-state area gals

I love the”Real Housewives.” Except for the originals. The OC crowd leaves me cold. But give me NY and NJ on a regular basis, and Atlanta and Miami part time. I dig it. And I miss the DC gals.

Anyway…

I still have to laugh. These broads have no clue as to what being a housewife really entails. Let me count the ways…

  1. A real housewife works 8 hours for little money. She then has to figure out how to make her shitty earnings feed and entertain a family of four.
  2. A real housewife never gets to pose for paparazzi outside a charity event. She makes cookies for the school bake sale and a horrible, candid photo of her might wind up in the yearbook.
  3. A real housewife makes her husband a makeshift birthday cake out of cake mix, pie filling and ice cream.
  4. A real housewife learns how to knit and crochet so her kids each have something handmade just for them to cherish for a lifetime.
  5. A real housewife does not make music videos unless she’s lip syncing Lady Gaga with her kids while the camera is running
  6. A real housewife still has a flip phone with no internet.
  7. A real housewife never uses the word “salon” unless it involves getting her hair done for a wedding.
  8. A real housewife does not air kiss
  9. A real housewife may flip a table, but not when cameras are rolling.
  10. A real housewife is usually tired, with a long list of more to do the next day

I’m feeling like a real “10” tonight. I’d better get some sleep so I can attack all the crap I have to do tomorrow.

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